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News and Media



The story so far…your son/daughter has been spending too much time on the computer, chatting and playing games with friends. Now a letter has arrived from School, saying they are worried too…What is going on?



A birthday present of an Ipad only creates problems: it’s not just the late-night chats, it’s the games and the photos as well. Why are my children not listening?



Two friends are laughing and being rude about a classmate, because of something they have on their phone. A friend tries to help and tell them where they are going wrong. Later that day, Police Officer calls at your house. 




Parental responses to questionnaire.  Some gave more than one response to a question.

  1. What is your way of accessing the internet at home / in your own time?

Phone 100%. Computers 50% Tablets 25%

  1. How many hours a week are the family on the internet? Including yourself.

15 hours 50%       25 hours 25%.   20 hours 25%

  1. How many social network accounts do they have?

None 50%    Adult use only 50%

  1. Can you name any of them?

What’s App / Facebook 50%

  1. Do you know if they play 18 rated games ? Y/ N?

Not allowed 100%

Could you say which ones?    N/A.

  1. Is it ok for them to share passwords online with someone famous someone they didn’t know? YES / NO?

No 100%


Passwords should never be shared.

Children have no internet access

Its not safe for kids

Phishing attacks and personal safety.

  1. Is it safe to chat online?

Only with family members, people we know. 25%

Yes and No.  25%

Yes 25%

Not really. The child doesn’t know who the person is at the other end. 25%

  1. What would you do if they received bullying texts?

Report them to the police 25%

Report it. 50%

Block the sender and report to the school. 25%

  1. What would you do if they put photos of them-selves online, when you had asked them not to?

I would have a good talk with them and explain myself carefully. 25%

Have them remove them but explain why.    25%

I would try to delete the pictures straight away.  25%

Take away gadgets for a period and explain the dangers 25%

  1. Which type of new media creates the most problems for you?

Facebook /Snapchat  /Instagram? Others?


I am the only user, my children too young. 25%

No problems so far. 25%

Facebook / Instagram and Youtube 50%.

PS4 apps and games with a social dimension 25%

  1. What can be done about websites which encourage young people to harm themselves?

Definitely should be removed or blocked

Is there such a thing?

The websites can be more private and more security

No experience of this. Report them to the police

  1. The main reason for young people not asking for help? Being judged? Embarrassment? Feel silly? Don’t know who to trust? Bad experience?

Responses included

Mainly because their friends will see them as stupid and a baby

Want to appear independent and mature.

Feeling embarrassment and silly

I imagine one factor is feeling they have done something wrong themselves.

  1. What can you do to help yourself?

Keep communicating and keep a wide view of internet development

Keep up to date and maintain vigilence

Help other people?

Encourage reports and experience sharing.

Give advice on being careful

Please say how many children you have:         2 children 75%     No response 25%

Age range   6 – 10  years

Do you sit with them / are you in the same room when they are on the internet?

Yes mostly. 25%

Yes.  25%

No. 25%


Is there anything else you would like to say? 

I feel we all need information to stay up with new developments and how to deal with them.

Really pleased that George Spicer is taking on a thorny issue!!!

2021: SAFER INTERNET DAY Isn’t just for today, It’s every day.


Yes we at My name is Tom Education Project believe like many people that,

SAFER INTERNET DAY isn’t just for today, it’s every day.

This year’s theme is Be the change: unite for a better internet.

One of the key messages from parents we spoke to was that the project needed to go into Primary schools, to work with staff and pupils to explore the key issues for them. Many schools are providing quality guidance, information and support, pupils of 8,9 and 10 know all about staying safe, they use the internet properly at school for their studies.

But because primary school children want to be like their older brothers and sisters, who often help them to get set up on social networks and because some parents aren’t aware of what is going on, the problems don’t go away. Not only that some of those problems, come back into school.

We are currently offering two schemes to Primary schools and their wider community; one for pupils  and one for  parents. Why parents? Because they often have secondary school age children too and we want to tackle the issues from both sides…

Pupils: 6 – 7 hours split into 4 sessions or can be done as a whole day activity. Sessions include:        

Warm up games, exercises and skills: Core values what are they?

Forum theatre to look at characters on the outside, fringe and centre of the problem.

Exploration of role play through characters and their experiences.

A media debate involving the whole group to explore some of their key concerns

One of the problems for some young children is that they want to be like their older brothers and sisters; to be able to do the things that they do. Clothes, staying up later, wear make-up, games, phones and social networks. They want all of the ‘fun’, but don’t realise the consequences. We use computers all the time in school. We wouldn’t do anything silly.

But then their older sibling helps and guides them to get online and access social media.

 Parents: 6 -7 hours split into 4 sessions or can be done as a whole day activity: Sessions include:

                                         Fun Drama games and exercises: Trouble shooting key problems

       Leading by example…what do you do to help the situation? 

Don’t dictate, negotiate: how does that work? 

Role play: Consolidating good practice.

Did you know that by the age of 5, some children will have 1,000 pictures on social media?

    One of the major arguments is, do parents have the right to assume control over their child’s identity? They believe, this is our child, we own their identity.

But children believe they can change and control their identity online.

‘Lucy’ is a good example. She said she had asked her dad to de-tag her from “stuff that doesn’t necessarily represent who I am now.”

“It was never a big issue or anything bad, just stuff I preferred people didn’t see,” she said. “There were photos my dad posted of me in Year 6 and Year 7 [aged 11 and 12]. Back then I was quiet and shy, I didn’t really have lots of friends.

For more information and to book a workshop please contact


on 07535737247 or email theatreisreallife|@live.co.uk


Well not if you are a teenager as the latest figures on self harming are released by a leading charity. 

The children’s charity NSPCC says nearly 19,000 children were admitted to hospital after harming themselves last year – a 14% rise over three years.

One school we know of, use to have two staff to cover all incidents of safeguarding including self harming. Now they have eight staff and anyone can deal with the issue of self harming. Schools are struggling to cope and sadly the situation will only get worse, yet we know why this is happening.

1. Schools focusing on the academic and not looking after the
personal development of young people.

2. The sexualisation of young people in the media.

3. Social network sites.

4. Peer pressure to ‘look good’

5. Parents / carers not doing enough to guide and support their loved ones.

Do we really have to believe in Father Christmas, in the hope that the situation will improve?

Wishing you all a safe and secure Christmas and a caring New Year from My name is Tom.



December news…Dazu Youth Club

                        dazu                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        YOUTH CLUB, SOUTHGATE. Friday 25th November 2016.


Presented the project to members and got a range interesting and thoughtful responses. Changes needed to the presentation and thank you to the members for their honesty. Thank you to Clare for the opportunity, and Liz and Dan for the support.  For more information about Dazu…http://www.dazu.co.uk/dazu.htm     

Edited Dazu